The Blame Game

At some point we have to stop playing the blame game. Pointing fingers only works for so long.

It’s easy to make excuses and explain to other people that the reason you aren’t where you want to be is because of this person or that person. The reason you didn’t get the girl is because it’s all her fault. The reason you haven’t excelled in your adult life, it’s your parents fault. We are all guilty of it. It’s easier to blame an outward person or situation that you didn’t have control over than blame yourself. Because that would require you to look in the mirror and how many of us have avoided that at all costs?

My childhood wasn’t easy, it was a true hell to experience the pain I went through at such a young age. It damaged me in so many ways and carried on into my adult life. It was extremely hard for me to break out of my pity party for that reason. I wanted to blame the world, my parents for failing me, my environment, society, the culture as a whole. But, blame it really only gets you so far.

Part of it is selfishness, yes my parents aided in my downfall as a child, but when I was a child I wasn’t aware how much they had gone through. I didn’t want to see their side or anyone’s really. I was only concerned with how everyone ruined my life and I had to pick up the pieces. It took a lot in me in order for me to open my mind and start to accept responsibility in my own life.

I know I’ve said this countless times, but you can only control yourself and how you react to certain situations. It’s so true though. There are going to be trails, trauma, and situations that you will have no power over. But, controlling yourself is the best way to weaponize against those outcomes. Holding onto blame and hate is only going to damage you further and keep you away from the person you’re supposed to be. Forgiveness isn’t for the other person, it is for you to let go of the burden of having it on your back. Because the pain that you carry, it’s ultimately hurting you more than the other person and eating away at you.

Accepting things as they are, moving on from the past, and slowly trudging forward is the ONLY way to get to the person you want to be. The past is always going to be as it is. And blaming other people only works for so long. At some point, you’re gonna wonder why you aren’t where you want to be and you have to start looking at yourself. But, shame doesn’t live here and doing things in an act of guilt will also not lead you to where you want to go. Be excited that you’ve had a self realization and move forward with a purpose.

I could say I wasted years doing things I wasn’t supposed to and blaming others, but it also led me here. Talking to you all, learning so much in the process, and strengthening my mind to its deepest depths. Accept the responsibility that you are the reason that things aren’t working out and change it with excitement. The obstacle isn’t other people, it’s you. Believe in the strength that you have to get through the trauma that you’ve bottled down and work through it to find yourself as a new person on the other side. I promise you, it’s worth it.