The Art of Breaking out of Co-Dependency

One of the hardest things for me is recognizing when to let go of someone. Ever since I was a teenager I had this horrible attachment to people and even if they did not treat me the way I deserved to be treated, I allowed them to consume my life and me. I stopped making myself a priority in order to keep them around because of how scared I was to let go.

During this healing journey, I’ve started to become aware of my worth and what I deserve. Not only that, but not allowing others to dictate what I should and shouldn’t do in my life. I gave so many people so much power over me. I allowed others to mold me into who they wanted me to be instead of just simply being myself. I was afraid. Afraid of their reaction and afraid that they would leave me.

But as I’m growing more, I’ve learned that not everyone is supposed to stay in your life forever and though it does hurt seeing them go, it is a part of life. Life is like a book and each year or season changes will come as much as we’d like to push them away. People will do the same because not everyone is meant to stick around until the end as much as we’d like them to. You’ll see people come and go and it’s okay to let them go because they were in your life for a reason even if it doesn’t make sense, they’ve helped you learn even more about yourself.

I’ve learned to accept the things I cannot control and shape the world into my own perspective and my own reality because constantly trying to man handle every situation in life is impossible and exhausting. We were made to weather the storm.

I have allowed myself to truly be my number one priority and I am still currently working on setting boundaries with myself and other people. If you don’t earn the art of setting boundaries and letting people go, then you’ll constantly feel like your life is out of control. But, don’t be fooled. Your life is entirely your responsibility. And if you continue to fail, you can’t blame anyone but yourself.

In this new year, reassess your priorities. Be sure that everything you’re doing is for the growth of yourself and not for everyone else. At the end of the day, you can only control your own outcome. Worrying about others' ideas of you or trying to fix, beg, and barter your way into having any kind of relationship is just giving yourself more work and ultimately going to lead you to exhaustion. Take all the time you need for yourself. And as much as it hurts, let them be who they are and continue being you.